WTF?
by KookieX7 Kami YAH YAHXD
Summary: Series of WTF earning Oneshots. I at least want a WTF at any part of the reviews.
1. Happy Birthday Natsuki!

"HAPPY BIRRTHDAYYYY!!!"

The small wolf froze, eye twitching to the occupants inhabitating her room. There was a spider, pulling pranks with devilish lime eyes; a hippo eating food; a green praying mantis…praying; a butterfly with a circle on her head…going in circles; and many other animals.

"Ah. Umm, why the hell are you animals in my room?!"

Natsuki the Wolf Cub tried to growl them off, but the bigger animals just did the 'we-did-all-this-for-you-so-you-better-enjoy-it' stare. Whimpering, the small cub went to the corner in depression.

"Whaa- the big animals are MEAN!!!"

Suddenly a Princess with Beautiful Red eyes appeared, and hugged the wolf cub.

A few years later, the wolf cub became human with some native American ritual, defeated World of Warcraft, and shot some random thug.

The Princess and The Used-to-be-cub-but-now-became-human lived happily ever after.

--

"WTF?! You bought me this piece of-"

Shizuru covered Natsuki's mouth before she let the foul curse spill into the ears of her friends. Everyone sweatdropped and scratched their cheeks, before telling Natsuki is was the best they all could afford.

"WHAT?! YOU CHEAP BASTARDS!"

"Natsuki, no bad words."

"Shizuru, please don't tell me this is all I get!!"

Shizuru winked. "Oh, you'll be getting' sum'n-sum'n later…"

"Later?"

--

LATER.

--

Natsuki entered her room.

There was a cake.

Shizuru came out of the cake.

God knows what the hell they did after that, so I'll stop writing.

WTf?

--

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NATSUKI!!!


	2. ZOMG

A..N: B-cuz, I felt like it.

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Natsuki-cub swore she was dreaming, because she was skipping…on her hind legs…in a valley full of beautiful flowers.

Unfortunately, the flowers were roses with evil little snickering thorns and stabbed in her leg, but suddenly a magical Monkey-Wizard flew down and healed her legs.

"OMG a MONKEY-Wizard!!! A creature so rare to human eyes!!!"

The monkey shrugged. "You aren't a human."

"Wha- O.M.G DUDE! Like, WTF MAN! …"

Natsuki-cub and the monkey looked at each other.

"…"

"…"

"Let's Dance!"

And so the Monkey-Wizard and Natsuki-Cub danced in the evil thorns, until Natsuki saw a giant Elephant. TEH Elephant squashed the monkey-wizard, and took out a pineapple and crushed Natsuki-cub's face in a slow-mo way.

"NOOO! THE PRICKLY PINEAPPLE IS AGAINST MY FACE! Although it is quite sexy…"

Natsuki-cub licked the pineapple and the world go 'boom'.

--

"ACK OMG WTF LMAO LOL ROFL!"

Natsuki jumped up. Another dream about the haunting book her friends gave her. It was a day after her birthday.

Really, it was.

How to prove it? Because there was a bump in the blanket covers next to her.

"Oh, Shizuru! You're still here?"

Suddenly Shizuru jumped up in a Pineapple-cosplay-costume and licked Natsuki's cheek. Fortuanetly, the house didn't go boom, but about 50 miles away, a certain Kendo Captain blew up into Magical Fairy Dust.

"Oh nooooooo, I'm allergic to dust!" and the 'certain' hated Kendo Captain commit Seppuku but he couldn't pick up the knife and/or stab himself, so he went back in time but went too far and got eaten by Cannibal Teletubbies.

Meanwhile, Shizuru in the Pineapple Costume and Natsuki are walking down a street, but suddenly a car crashes into a person in front of them and the person became alive with some rainbow chain against their chest screaming "Oooh I'm Micheal Jackson-Ghost- ooh, ghost little boy! Come here!!"

And then Natsuki suddenly poofed into another dimension with Shizuru still in her Pineapple-costume, and some sponge tried to make a door and go inside Shizuru's Pineapple.

---------------------------------------------.

Okay, these are going to be random stories!


	3. Happy Birthday Shizuru!

"Holy Hell!?"

The wolf looked at the snake, in a bikini and stunna shades.

"What?"

The animals transformed back to their rightful bodies, and stared at each other in silence. "What, what?!"

The snake, now Shizuru, was in baggy clothes and a lop sided SF hat, and her hair was tied in a messy bun. Natsuki sighed. "Ghetto posing BOP!"

"OMG, you called me a BOPPER, i thought you loved me! Beezey fo' sheezy!"

"Oh hell no! Bitch slappin' time homie G...i mean, S!"

The two started making out, and soon had hot hot sex.

--

"ACK! i forgot! Happy birthday Shizuru! Your 21! Let's buy some booze!"

Shizuru smiled at her naked lover. _"Ima Buy you a drink, ooh oooh ooooh..."_

"Old song."

_"G-L-A-M, O-R-O-U-S yeahhh, we're flying first class, up in the sky-"_

"Shizuru! Old. Song!!!!"

The two sighed...

_"I love it, i love it, you love it, you love it, everytime, everytime, we touch'n, we touch'n. I want it, I want it, You want it, you want it, I'll see you, I'll see you, in the morning, in the morning..." _Shizuru sung, quite beautifully in Spanish.

"Shizuru! Shut up!"

Shizuru kissed her lover, and sung on. _"Ima run my fingers through your hair, wrap me up in yerrr legs, and love yah till your eyes go back…"_

"Ach! Sexual Connotation!"

Natsuki covered her naked ears that we're naked to begin with and never really had clothes therefore there weren't really naked, but Natsuki thought not, and she put mittens on her ears and started running around.

"The British are here, The British are here!!!"

"Uno, Dos, Tres, Quato, Synco, Ses!"

"WTF Shizuru!!!"

"_And oh, I'm into you and  
Girl no one else would do  
With every kiss and every hug  
You make me fall in love  
And now I know I can't be the only one  
I bet there's hearts all over the world tonight  
With the love of their life who feel  
What I feel when I'm with you, with you, with you, with you, with you... girl  
With you, with you, with you, with you, with you... Oh girl"_

"Shizuru! Stop it! Do you even know Chris Brown?"

"No. Lmao, is he brown!"

"YES! He's CHOCOLATE!"

Shizuru gaped at Natsuki. "Your Racist!"

"BOOZE!"

"BOOBS!"

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Happy birthday :) Shizuru Fujino. Written because I think (idk if it is) Shizuru's birthday because other people are putting up fics…might as well update this :D.


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